- to connect with other self-directed learners in my area
- Anything veterinary-, travel-, or good book-related! Also, food.
Because I always wanted to go to college and can't afford it, I have tons of healthy resentment inspiring me to make something of my life anyway. I haven't been particularly good at this so far, so I'm (re-)joining the ZTC community in an effort to, you know, do that thing I said. For examples of the kind of melodramatic victim act I can work myself into, read Langston Hughes' "A Dream Deferred" or YouTube that coulda-been-a-contender scene from "On the Waterfront."
Okay. I'm not the sort of person who's cut out to be a self-directed learner. If I had a dog I would name it Failure, that’s how companionable we’ve become. If I had a cat I would call it Quitting, and my gerbil would be WHY ME, GOD. And all of those animals would be isolated from each other and feel their animal versions of loneliness and misery in order to symbolize the fact that whenever I myself am poorly socialized I become depressed and start failing and quitting and whining all over the place like a goddamn toddler.
(Worth mentioning this is not one of my favorite qualities in myself.)
- Wanted and planned to go to college but couldn't afford it (parents can't contribute)
- Financially independent *by necessity*, which is not as fancy as it sounds (takes forever to save any $$, limited mobility, crappy apartments, the kind of stuff that totally works if you're a starving artist but definitely doesn't if you have no desire to in any way resemble a starving artist)
- Tired of being bitter/scared/sad/stagnant about this set of circumstances and ready to do something with my life because, good lord child, you're only twenty, get some perspective.
My interests at the moment are fairly broad, and my main concern is finding ways to pursue them that allow me to meet new people and join communities. Most autodidacts are probably already familiar with how damn hard it is to replicate a social world like college when you're outside setting everything up on your own.
A sampling of my interests:
- Animals, animals, animals. They're furry, they're scary, they're badass, some of them come in small versions you can fit in a teacup! (potential long-term goal is to become a vet tech)
- Psychology. I can read a book a day on this stuff.
- WWOOFing, because everyone who does it looks like they're having so much doggone fun (! pun!)
- Becoming competent in outdoorsy things
- Getting my open/advanced open water diving certification (this one is purely aspirational but I do have this dream of living in Hawai'i someday)
- Gender studies, because nothing else is quite as helpful for getting over being dumped
And a sampling of things/people I like:
- Glenn Gould
- E.M. Forster
- Edna St. Vincent Millay
- MGM/RKO musicals
- Martin Scorcese movies (I may boycott Roman Polanski but I can't boycott *all* his supporters...)
- good slam poets
- Ken Burns documentaries
Okay, I'm really bad at keeping things concise so I'm going to make myself stop now. I've linked to my blog in the margin just in case you find me totally fascinating and want to learn more.